Alt Endings collection
by Dryad7
Summary: We all know how Lord of the Rings ended. But did it have to end that way? What if...
1. I AM YOUR FATHER

Frodo marched up the Mountain of Doom, ready to finally fulfil his quest and destroy The One Ring. As he entered the chamber of lava, he gasped in horror.

SAURON WAS STANDING RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF HIM!

Sauron opened his mouth–most likely to totally annihilate Frodo, Sam, and Gollum in one fell swoop. "**Frodo**," he said, "**I am your father**."

"NOOOOOOO!" Frodo cried, flinging his hands up in distress. Suddenly, the Ring flew out of his hands and began falling to the lava below.

**"NOOOOOOO!"** cried Sauron, diving after it in dismay. "Yes!" Sam said, pumping his fist distinctively.

_"NOOOOOOO!"_ screamed Smeagol, leaping after his precious Ring. "YES! YES!" said Sam once more, jumping for joy.

"NOOOOOOO!" cried Frodo, beginning to dive after them. "YE- Hey, wait a minute, Mr. Frodo!" said Sam, as he grabbed Frodo's feet and hauled him back to safety.

Sauron, Gollum, and the Ring continued tumbling towards the lava.

**"NOOOOOOO!"**_"NOOOOOOO!"_"YES! YES! YES! YES!" Sam sang as he danced a victory jig.

And The Ring melted to bits. "NOOOOOOO!" screamed Frodo, as Sam began forming a one-person conga line. Then the Ring exploded. Sam paused his dance and grabbed Frodo and escaped the exploding mountain.

And the Ring was no more.


	2. Beware the Poppies

Alt. Ending to LOTR 2

Once again, Frodo marched up the Mountain of Doom, experiencing a slight feeling of déjà vu. _I wonder why,_ he mused._ It's not like I march up mountains all the time._ He marshaled his wayward thought s and continued marching, then realized he wasn't in Middle Earth any more. "Sam, where are we?"

"I don't know Mr. Frodo, but it's almost annoyingly colorful. I think it's giving Stinker here convulsions." Sam replied, giving an almost negligent kick to Gollum.

"Oh, why does the mean hobbit hurt us? Why? Nasty colors chokes us, yes, and nasty red flowers." whined Smeagol, curling into a little ball on the strangely yellow road.

"Red flowers? You're right, Smeagol, they do have an awful smell." Frodo glanced around, noticing a sleeping girl in the meadow. _Maybe she knows where we are,_ he thought. He began marching toward her.

"Mr. Frodo, Mr. Frodo, wake up!" He opened his eyes to see Sam staring down at him with a worried expression on his face. "You've been sleeping for hours! Aren't you planning on coming to your own birthday party? Gandalf and Gimli are waiting by the Party Tree."

Frodo rubbed his hair and yawned. "I'll be right there, Sam."

The Ring was still no more.


	3. The Eagles!

Frodo was marching through Ithilien, determined to find a way into Mordor. Above him, a screeching voice filled the air, xausing Him and Sam both to cover their earrs. Circling lower and lower, the flying creature finally touched ground as its rider slid off its back. "Frodo, my most excellent hobbit!" cried a merry voice. Hardly beliving his eyes, Frodo joyfully exclaimed, "Gandalf! I thought you were dead!"

"So did I, my dear chap, but that's not important right now. This most wondrous fellow—" he poited to the eagle "—has offered to take you to Mount Doom. I suggest you take him up on his offer, and quickly."

Sam waved at Frodo as he soared off. "Good luck Mr. Frodo! Have a nice time destroying the Ring!"

Not that much longer, Frodo found himself hovering over the mouth of Mount Doom. Dropping the Ring quickly, he and the eagle flew off as Mount Doom exploded, and Barad-dur fell.

And the Ring was no more.


	4. With a Wand and a Way

Frodo was trudging through the rocks of Emyn Muil, loyal Sam following on his heels. Just as they reached the top of one cliff, they heard a loud CRACK and beheld a strange sight. Two people, a boy with tousled black hair and striking green eyes, and a girl with bushier hair than Gandalf, stood before them.

"Who are you, and are you a servant of the Dark tower or not?" Frodo said sternly, attempting to sound dangerous. It was difficult not to laugh when the two children were pointing flimsy sticks at him in what was supposed to be a threatening manner.

"EXPELLIARMUS!" cried the boy, and a jet of red light flew at Frodo.

"NOOOOOO!" cried Sam, throwing himself in front of Frodo. However, when the light hit him, nothing happened.

The girl tugged on the boy's arm. "Harry, I think they're good. It's from a Muggle book, a very good one, called the Lord of the Rings. I was thinking about it right before we apparated, and apparently we apparated into the book."

The boy, Harry, shrugged. Evidently, stranger things had happened to him. Frodo was bewildered. What were these strange people talking about? He decided to attempt conversation again. "Who are you? And what book do you speak of? Will it help me get rid of this foul Ring?"

Harry turned to the girl. "Hermione, what on earth is he talking about?"

Hermione replied, "Let me talk to him, I think I can work this out. It won't take long."

…

_Four hours later._

"…and so if you'll just let us take you by side-along apparition, you can complete your journey that much quicker."

Frodo was completely bemused. He still didn't understand a word she had said, but they were not trying to kill him, or take the Ring, so they must not be bad.

"Alright, then." he said, and Harry and Hermione grabbed him and Sam, and turned on the spot. Frodo experienced a sickening rush of colors, and caught a glimpse of Sauron's Eye, and suddenly, they were there.

"Welcome to Mount Doom," said Hermione, rather proud of herself. "Quick, throw the Ring in!"

Frodo stared at the Ring for a few heartbeats, then yelled, "NO!" and tossed it into the heart of Mount Doom. Hermione's smug smile evaporated and she whispered a few words to Harry. They grabbed Frodo and Sam again, and turned—EXPLOSIONS COLOR SOUNDS—and Frodo and Sam were standing in a courtyard in Rivendell.

And the Ring was no more.


	5. Legos! THE HORROR

Frodo trudged towards Mount Doom. As he trudged, Sam noticed that strange indentations appeared on it at regular intervals, suggesting that it was, in fact, a manufactured object. Sam's suspicions were confirmed when one piece fell off and landed right by them.

Further inspection revealed the 'rock' was box shaped, with six squat little knobs adorning it. Sam couldn't be sure, but it appeared to be made of plastic. Frodo noticed Sam's strange occupation. "What are you doing, Sam?" he queried querulously. Strangely enough, Frodo sounded like plastic, as well.

Sam gazed in horror at the shocking panorama. The whole world had suddenly transformed to plastic! A giant hand scooped them up and dropped them in their box...

The End

"No, not the end! Tell the world! Frodo cannot continue his quest from a cardboard box in a retail store! Gandalf, save us!

THE END

"Sam, look! If you stack the bricks together, you can make Rivendell!"

Sam: gasp! Horror

_THE END_

"You shall not reduce Sauron to plastic! The maker of the One Ring is far more powerful than mmph…

_**THE END, If I have to say it again, I'm blowing up the alternate universe.**_


End file.
